Sunday, August 05, 2007

Dinner dilemma

Skeeter and I are part of a "care unit" at our church. We are part of a team of people who bring meals, visit ones in the hospital, call members we haven't seen in a while . . . you get the idea.

Tomorrow I'm scheduled to make a meal for a couple who just had a baby. Normally it's not an extraordinary task. But tomorrow's will be, for me.

I'll be taking a meal to one of the members who has shown obvious disdain for me. We had an altercation once. It hasn't really gotten better. Since then I've tried to be the bigger person, but she sends those signals -- you know what I mean -- every time I've spoken to her. Today at church I walked over to her to ask if she had any particular likes or dislikes for her meal, and she looked at me, said, "I've got to feed the baby" and walked off.

So now I'm in a dilemma. Should I get take-out for them (nice take-out, but still, not homemade) or do I spend three hours in the kitchen making something I fear she'll just toss in the trash because it's from me? I think I'd be better with having lost the $25 than three hours. And to make matters slightly more difficult, her house is thirty miles from mine. Nothing I take will still be warm enough to eat.

A friend said, "It's not you. She has hurt others with her words. We need to pray for her."

I agree with that. Wholeheartedly. And I have been praying for her. But I have also been intentionally not putting myself in a position for her to say anything particularly hurtful to me.

So tomorrow will be a test for me -- for my strength and my patience. All over dinner.

1 comment:

PEZmama said...

Go the extra mile. Love her beyond her expectations. You've forgiven her, now give her every reason to believe it.

If you brought her take-out, would she feel slighted that you didn't think she was worth the time for a home-cooked meal? This is my opinion: make her the best meal you can make. You are right, she may throw it out, but at least she will have no reason to say that you didn't offer your best. It would be three hours wasted for you, that is true, but the MESSAGE conveyed by the three hours is what means the most: "I love you even though you were mean to me. I have forgiven you, so you get all the best of me."

Just my opinion.